A Schurz Exposé: Do these Brats Recycle?

By Lauren Looney

Recycling is one of the most elementary attempts at sustainable living. Seriously, toddlers and gorillas can sort their own refuse (though at the moment, I have no research to back the latter up).  So as I lose faith daily in our campus’ ability to do the simplest things for the environment, I wondered how my residence hall, Schurz, was doing in the recycling department. After doing a little investigating/snooping/breaking-and-entering, I was shocked at what I found. This post is for mature audiences only, so the young don’t lose faith in humanity.

In the recycling room: the lights were on! Despite the plastic recycling bin being centimeters away, the regular bins were full of plastic bottles. Cardboard and a creepy leg lamp was in the aluminum bin. Filthy napkins were in paper bin.

What I found in dorms was not any more comforting. The people on my floor were not reluctant at all to show me how they were improperly recycling. They found my horrified expressions quite amusing.

Note to self- no more investigative reporting unless I plan on paying for expensive stomach ulcer surgery. Note to Schurz residents- stop devolving, gorillas are one-upping you.

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2 thoughts on “A Schurz Exposé: Do these Brats Recycle?”

  1. The blog is funny but what was exposed is tragic!
    Schurz Hall is always having meetings.
    This dismal recycling performance would be a good topic for the next meeting. (IMO)

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